Praise team... college leadership team, small group, mission trips, youth retreats, KASE, internships, Tech...
Everything I do.. is it because I truly believe it's what God wants me to do? Or is it simply because I just want to please other people? I make a great follower, but do I make a good enough leader? I just want to look good in other people's eyes; I want to make other people happy. Pastor Peter, Pastor Jae, Pastor Joe, George, moksanneem, mommy, grandma, youth group, college group, my friends... I just want other people to see me and think, "Oh wow, what a great person!" I want other people to see the things I do and just like me better because of them. I just want to please other people. My heart motive is making me lose my sense of purpose...
I have no backbone, no spine.
That's why I can never say no.
That's why I'm so indecisive.
I can never decide what I want to do or what I want to eat...
I can't even decide whether I want to be in a relationship or not.
Pretty much every decision I've ever made in my whole life was made based on what other people told me to do. If I didn't have my own strong opinion on the matter, then it was always decided by other people. Going to Tech-- because my mom and grandma told me to. Coming in as a management major-- because my friend from high school suggested it. Switching to ISYE major-- because other people thought it would be better for me. Internship over the summer-- mom. Mission trips-- pastors. I didn't know what I wanted for myself, so I just went along with what other people told me.
If I didn't have my own opinion, then I just went with what other people told me to do. SO when I'm finally given a chance to make my own choice.... I just don't know what to do.
Pretty much every decision I've ever made in my whole life was made based on what other people told me to do. If I didn't have my own strong opinion on the matter, then it was always decided by other people. Going to Tech-- because my mom and grandma told me to. Coming in as a management major-- because my friend from high school suggested it. Switching to ISYE major-- because other people thought it would be better for me. Internship over the summer-- mom. Mission trips-- pastors. I didn't know what I wanted for myself, so I just went along with what other people told me.
If I didn't have my own opinion, then I just went with what other people told me to do. SO when I'm finally given a chance to make my own choice.... I just don't know what to do.
I just do whatever would please other people most.
I have no voice of my own.
"...for God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control."
So where is my own power? Why do I only have fear?
...
Damn this sinful nature of mine.
"...for God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control."
So where is my own power? Why do I only have fear?
...
Damn this sinful nature of mine.
find a balance between what's good for you and what the other person needs. sometimes you have to put your foot down and do what is completely good for you. just hope that the other person understands that you did it because it brought you the most happiness. if they really do care, they'll be happy that you're happy. the moment someone tries to control another person is where things take a turn for the worst. if you think you're sinful you will be. it's all in your head. you would give eating a separate section of things to do hahahaha
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