Am I wasting my life?

The longer I stay at this school, the more I am convinced that I don't belong here.

Is Pastor Joe right? Is Jonathan right? Is Jennie right?

Do I really belong somewhere else?

Otherwise, why am I majoring in something that I'm not passionate about?

Is it really worth the sleepless nights, the hours of studying, the stress and exhaustion?

Why do I try so hard, only to fail over and over again?

What am I doing with my life?

What is my purpose?

My purpose is to glorify God and to expand His kingdom... and to enjoy Him.

Am I doing that here?

I don't know.

Will I do that if I go somewhere else?

I don't know.

Am I glorifying Him if I waste my potential?

Am I even wasting my potential right now?

What are my passions?

What are my dreams?

Should I let my passions and dreams direct the course of the rest of my life?

What do I want to do ten... no, five... not even, two years from now?

What is my calling?

Well for now, to just be a student... but am I being the best student that I can possibly be?

Would I be a better student somewhere else, if I did something I even mildly enjoyed?

Why do I keep failing when I study so hard?

How do I fail the easiest test of one of the easiest teachers here?

Do I just belong somewhere else?

Or am I supposed to keep fighting through this?

AM I WASTING MY LIFE?





---
... God.  I am lost in a sea of uncertainty and failure.
Please.  Give me something.  A sign, a vision...  anything.
I don't want to waste the gift of life that You have given me
But right now, it certainly feels like I am.